Not Even Slightly New! - See the (now ended) Official Thing #5 Audience Participation Contest!!!
Welcome to a bizarre world of absurdity and surreality... A world of insanity... A world in which I can make up and use words like surreality. Here, you can experience the madness of Stuff that Happened to Thing #5 - formerly known as Insanity and Gibberish in Thrilling 3-D!
This epic tale is a serial adventure, and currently spans a whole bunch of glorious episodes. It began an unspeakable amount of time ago...probably about 1988. Of course, that was way back when there was still an episode #1. Thankfully, such is no longer the case. Now it starts with episode #2. Right now you might be thinking, "What? That's only about about one episode a year, and they're only a couple pages long each! That's pathetic!" If you really are thinking that, I have three things to say:
- Wow, how did you know that they're only a few pages long each?
- There was a break between episode 2 and 3 that spanned about 3 years, and then a few other dead periods intermittantly since then. I don't have a lot of time to spend on this project.
- Who cares? Quality takes time, and so did this.
Over time, the story has evolved from fairly random insanity printed in two-page installments to something even more terrifying. Episodes now exceed four pages, and contain coherent action and dialog. So, if you hate episode 2, try reading episode 7, or even 10, to see if they're more to your liking.
Note: Please don't distribute any copies of these episodes without my name attached. Even if it's all pointless gibberish, at least it's my pointless gibberish, and I'd like to get the credit for it. Thanks.
Like I said above, there is no episode #1, so start right in on episode #2. Enjoy!
Episode 2: The Search for More Absurdity
Episode 3: The Endless Quest of Plotlessness
Episode 4: The Symbolism of Cymbals, Or Lack Thereof
Episode 5: Am I Hallucinating, Or is That a Mirage Over There?
Episode 6: The Collapsible Orange and Three Other Tails
Episode 7: Thing #5 vs. MechaGodzilla - or - Attack of the Amazing Werespoons!
Episode 8: Hwango the Indistinct and Other Vegetables
Episode 9: Albatross the One's Tangy Pasta Strudel
Episode 10: Ambiguity and Other Vacation Spots
Episode 11: The Eels! The Eels! They Have Me!
Episode 12: The Phantom Episode
Episode 13: Attack of the Killer Pacifists!
Episode 14: Emily
Episode 15: This is Not an Episode
Episode 16: Captain Continuity and the Magic Tea Kettle